“I can’t do this.” Those were some of the first words I thought when I heard my doctor say that I had cancer. Didn’t cancer know that I was only 29 years old, I just celebrated my 9th wedding anniversary and 2 years prior we adopted our three children. Life was going so well.
Cancer was not something that I ever thought would be a part of my life. Who does? However, I do believe that everything happens for a reason and I was going to embrace this change. My can’t turned into can and I fought back against cancer. One surgery and five rounds of chemotherapy later, I beat cancer!!! Hearing the doctors say that I was in remission was one of the best days of my life.
I did not get through cancer though without my amazing support system. Family and friends delivered meals, watched the kids, helped with house cleaning, yard work and so much more. My favorite scripture verse during this time was found in Psalms 30:2 “O Lord my God I cried to you for help and you healed me.” During this time I relied on God for everything and He protected and took care of me and my family during this major change in our life. In fact, change has helped me realize areas of my life where I need to allow God to work. In my personal life, my family, my job, and my health. There is not a day that goes by that I am not reminded of the changes that have happened in my life.
Over the last year or so I have wanted to get better at being healthy mentally and physically. Anyone that is close to me knows I have the eating habits of a kindergartner and exercise happens when I’m walking around campus at work. I never was really motivated to change this part of my life. I love food too much, because food, well, it makes me happy. So I finally embraced this much needed change and took part in the Change Up program at Get Fit. I loved going to the gym the few times I went, and my favorite activity was participating in the boxing class. I understood what it was going to take to make the official change to a healthier way of living, but mentally I was not ready to be fully committed. Consequently, I went right back to all of my addictive eating habits. Again I told myself I need to change my old ways and thankfully through work they were offering their employees a chance to participate in a Boot Camp called Lion Fit. I was off to another great start, my husband joined me this time and this brought some much needed change to our whole family. I thought for sure the habits we created would continue. My husband loved going to the gym and still does to this day. But the change did not last for me…again, sigh!
Fast forward to today. I have gained all the weight back, am as lazy as ever and know the change that needs to be made. However, I can’t help but think how can this time be different, since I have already tried twice and failed. I can’t make this change a reality. I can’t keep up these eating habits. I can’t stick with it. Then it hit me! “Why are you being so negative?” Remember what you told yourself when you said you can’t beat cancer? Turn your can’t into can. So here goes Round 3, I can do this and I will do this. I can do this because I have all the tools that I need, I have an amazing support system, and I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. (which is another one of my favorite verses).
This time it will be different, I am so thankful that I have another opportunity to make this much needed change and raise money for my non-profit organization the Chemo Crew.
I hope you will join me on this journey and see how God uses this change in my life to continue to reach out to moms, dads, siblings, friends, and others affected by cancer in our community.